Three incident scenarios — silent quality regression after deploy, agent loop cost explosion, prompt injection wave — each with four interventions ranging from "best response" to "this is why we keep losing trust." Pick the scenario, watch the metrics drift, choose your intervention, see the blast radius. The visceral lesson: 80% of LLM incident response is having the right instinct in the first 10 minutes. Strong on-call engineers know which lever to pull before the page even fires; weak ones discover their playbook in the middle of the incident.